Be Kind Help Others

I’ve been feeling very restless lately. Sometimes I feel like I’m right back to where I started seven months ago with the tossing and turning in bed and yearning for physical contact with a man. In those times it is just a warm body I’m after and not a connection of heart and spirit which was part of the reason I stopped seeing men in the first place.

The difference now, however, is that I am hopeful about having a relationship in the future and feel as though the work I’m doing now is preparing me for the time when that right person comes along for me. I have no idea when that will happen and understand now that it is out of my hands. All I can do is work on my career, get my values in place, help others, be honest in all my affairs, and remember that every day that I live consciously is a day I am becoming a better person, better prepared to receive a good person into my life.

The things that used to be most important to me: physical appearance, dress codes, status and lifestyle, are now superfluous. A partner is not something you pursue like a goal, it’s something you attract effortlessly when you are in the right time and place to receive him. I no longer have the sense that I must jump on men like opportunities because if it’s right it will happen. I also know that a relationship should be effortless and feel good. I want someone who believes in God and wants to help others because it’s the right thing to do not because it makes him look good. So far that’s all I know.

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