The Bachelor: Relationship Ready?

A few posts back I wrote that going against your “type” was the most likely way to have a successful relationship. Since our “type” is based on lust which is one of the seven deadly sins, it is a terrible reason to choose a partner if you want a relationship that lasts more than one night. In the name of research, I’ve been looking at relationship blogs and one “expert” backs up my theory. Bob from Understanding Men writes:

I’d like to believe The Bachelor and his new fiancee were going to live happily ever after. I really would like to see them succeed, but I just can’t see how. Theirs is the recipe for disaster. Intense beginnings that are based more on “chemistry” than substance make wonderful Hollywood movies, but terrible marriages. Why you ask? Because marriage is more about what you do when there is no chemistry rather than what you do when you’re full of emotion.

He’s explained here clearly and succinctly what I’ve spent many more words (and years) trying to figure out. Marriage is about shared values, companionship and camaraderie. It is about kindness, honour, respect and affection. It is about acceptance and love. It is not about mind-blowing sex, a roller coaster of emotions, “passionate” shouting matches, or how “hot” you look to each other.

Relationships are based on two things lacking in our current society: longevity and the time it takes to really know another person. Lust has no place in a healthy relationship.

What do you think?

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