Love, honesty and forgiveness

sex, abstinence, celibacy, dating, relationship, men, women

Have you ever apologized to an ex? I’ve had this feeling that the last guy I dated before I began my year of abstinence/celibacy deserves an explanation from me as to why I stopped communicating with him. I really didn’t close the deal in terms of breaking up in a civilized fashion, and instead got tired of him not paying enough attention to me and ceased all contact, deleting him from my Facebook, Twitter and phone in one fell swoop.

It’s not that he was this great guy and I was a demon. The problem is I never told him what I needed (more of his attention) and yet expected him to deliver it. I was asking him to read my mind and then cutting him out when he couldn’t. Perhaps the result would have been the same if I had been truthful about what I wanted from him. But how will I know? My pride was such that I couldn’t make myself vulnerable enough to tell him I wanted more from him. I felt that would have appeared needy and given him the upper hand.

I’m no longer interested in this man so it’s not an excuse for a reconciliation (I checked my motives there) but just a niggling feeling that I didn’t give this person a fair shot to be a better partner. I want to tell him I’m sorry I wasn’t honest, that’s all.

Have you ever done anything like that?


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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. You should tell him.

    • Thank you, I will. I think I will feel better and he will, too. (Unless he thinks I’m crazy which I’m willing to risk).

      • We are women, if men thought we were sane it just wouldnt be right haha (:

      • Maybe that’s part of what they call the mystery.

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