Today was a better day. I did lots of exercise and cared nothing about my appearance and I did have to masturbate this afternoon before taking a nap. Pleasuring myself is getting really boring; physically I’m dying for a man which I know is impossible. I asked my friend if masturbating is breaking the vow of celibacy and she said as long as you’re not missing work or becoming a hermit as a result of over-stimulation everything is ok.
When I first became celibate I used to masturbate every night because I was beside myself with physical craving. In just two months I’ll be finished my one year respite and I know I won’t be having sex on the anniversary…I’ve decided even when I meet someone I’ll wait for sex, possibly even until marriage. Samantha on Sex and the City once spent an entire afternoon taking care of herself which prompted the girls to ask one another who is their masturbation guy, the one they fantasize about to get things going. One of them said Russell Crowe.
If pressed to name a masturbation guy mine would be Colin Farrell. I once had sex in a movie theatre during a Colin Farrell movie because I was so turned on (we were the only ones in the place). I also had sex right after watching Good Will Hunting because the Matt Damon character made me randy. Who’s your masturbation guy?
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