Men are dynamic, women magnetic

sex, relationship, marriage, men, women, gifts, God

Dr. Pat Allen says that no woman wants to give, protect and cherish anyone over the age of 10 unless she is given what she needs first. The mistake we and society make is in believing that nurturing is a feminine quality when it is actually masculine. That makes a lot of sense to me in the way I feel when taking care of my two daughters. Caring for my children does feel very masculine because it is a leadership role that requires me to discipline and make decisions and be a role model. Although I adore my time with my girls and am so grateful to be their mom, I feel the need to replenish after a day of looking after them with some quiet feminine time to myself, be it a candlelit bubble bath or meditation.

When I’m allowed to be magnetic and “enchanting”, just being in my feminine energy, it feels “right” whereas trying to make things happen by being assertive and aggressive feels like I’m going against my nature. Which I am. Dr. Allen says women are meant to be magnetic and receptive and men dynamic and giving, that women must be rooted in their own sense of self-worth and men must feel competent and adequate. It’s that cherish vs. respect thing.

That’s why men are drawn to women that seem like they don’t need them and turned off by women who come across as desperate. Because a desperate woman doesn’t know her value. At the same time, giving a man too much can turn him off as he is meant to be the giver. I can attest to this in my last relationship where I made the mistake of thinking I had to reciprocate his giving in a material way. Men give to show their love; they don’t want anything in return except our respect.

What do you think of these ideas?


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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Oh snap. I see you have the same wordpress theme as me.

    “That’s why men are drawn to women that seem like they don’t need them and turned off by women who come across as desperate.”

    No, no, no. Dr Allen is totally wrong. That’s pure projection!

    Its women who are turned off by desperate or needy men. Not the other way round.

    The intangible qualities of a man are far more important to a woman than the intangible qualities of a woman are to a man.

    • Dr. Allen didn’t say that, I did! I made a calculated assumption, and as you say I could be wrong.

  2. This is a very interesting perspective. I know in the office, if a woman expects to be successful, she is expected to be assertive and a woman who makes things happen. Those are masculine traits that she must use if she wants to push through and get ahead.
    This is a interesting post.

    • I think it’s OK to take on those masculine traits to do those jobs, but it’s important to realize they are masculine roles and at the end of the day to replenish your femininity. A lot of women get stuck in that masculine role and it takes its toll physically. For example, how many corporate execs have you heard of that can’t get pregnant and then they quit the rat race and get pregnant right away?

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