Feeling your feelings

Right now I’m in this place where I’m feeling my feelings. Feeling my feelings? What? Well, I’m learning how to observe my emotions without judging them and even taking information from them that might be useful for me as I move forward on my journey. I used to do everything I could to stifle my emotions; I found them inconvenient and annoying more than anything. I didn’t understand that anger could be anything other than rage, so I was afraid of it and stifled it until it came out in inappropriate ways.

Now I know that anger is the body’s way of providing information and making it difficult not to act. Anger may be telling you that your boundaries are being violated and you need to establish them more firmly or let go of a person or situation that is repeatedly trampling on those boundaries. Anger has generally been a sign to me that I have not been treated the way I deserve, that my feelings were being minimized or invalidated, and I used to accept that and move along. Now, I insist on being treated with dignity and know that my feelings are worthy of validation. I have a right to my feelings! We all do and there are no good feelings or bad feelings…they just are.

Now, if I share my feelings and someone tries to tell me I’m overreacting or I don’t have a right to feel that way, I begin to question whether that person is a positive force in my life. Maybe they need to deal with their own problems around feeling their feelings. Me, I am seeking out others who can be honest and forthright about their emotions, who are not afraid to tell the truth about how they feel, and who will not make me feel bad for having a feeling that might be “inconvenient”.

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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Thanks!

  2. Thanks for sharing this. I recently downloaded calling in the one to kindle and I absolutely love it, just got done with the chapter about feelings. I had been the same way when someone invalidated my feelings usually because they wanted to continue getting what they wanted, I would think I was overreacting and now I realize when someone trys to override my feelings, they are someone I dont want to associate with bc like you said, they arent dealing with their own feelings.

    • Isn’t ‘The One’ terrific? I’m on the very last chapter today and I feel like I know myself and what I want (both in a partner and in life) so much better. I feel really confident that I am just fine without a significant other and am even wondering if I actually want one since I am enjoying my free time so much. If I’m honest, I think I do want someone but it does take going outside your comfort zone.


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